A one-way relationship can be very uncertain and excruciating. What’s more painful is to identify and realize that you’re involved in a one-sided relationship. It is better if you can recognize the signs as early as possible so that you can avoid indulging yourself too much and regain your stability. We have explained what it feels like to be in such a relationship and also what causes one-sided relationships.[toc]
What is a one-sided relationship?
Relationships are about mutual love, showing love by hitting a pick up line, respect and understanding. You depend on each other and respect each other’s personal space and priorities. When there is balance and stability, you can call it a healthy romantic companionship.
When a relationship is one sided, the energies and the feelings feel imbalanced. One partner would be putting in all their efforts, but the other slowly drifts away.
Though there could be certain situations in life that may drive you apart from your partner. It could be work pressure, family issues, emotional breakdown or anything. Ups and downs are part and parcel of a relationship and when you come through all that, you both become closer to each other than before.
However, to understand what is a one sided relationship, or whether you are in a one sided relationship, one must be aware of the causes or signs of such a relationship.
You would start realizing that you’re the one making all the efforts in your relationship – from making calls, booking a table for a dinner date or showing up for your partner. Before you get yourself emotionally attached to an extent that being away hurts immensely, it is better to know more about the signs of a one sided relationship.
Signs of a one sided relationship
One sided relationship or a one sided marriage mostly feel painful or crippling. If you are able to understand the signs or what causes one-sided relationships, it will help you avoid the pain or agony of an imbalanced relationship. It is not the responsibility of a single partner to maintain or hold on to their relationship dynamic. It is a team effort.
You’re the only one who puts work into the relationship.
A relationship is between two equal individuals who put in an equitable amount of effort and compromises to make it successful. Stability and balance are very crucial parts of a romantic relationship.
When you start to notice that you are the only one making efforts in a relationship, then it is a sign of a one sided relationship. Both partners are responsible for maintaining the spice and excitement in a relationship. It is not the responsibility of one person.
You make excuses for their behavior.
As a couple, you are responsible for each other’s behaviors. You attend important parties together or make time for your partner’s big days. When you start to find yourself making excuses for your partner’s behavior, because they are either having a bad day or are unable to show up at an important event, don’t get it as hopeless romanticism.
If they keep making such excuses, then you can sit and talk about it. And if they are making silly or unjustifiable reasons and avoid a healthy discussion, then this is a red flag.
You do not have to be the only one making adjustments and playing the role of the “understanding” partner. It is a responsibility of both partners.
There are more negative than positive emotions when you think about them.
A healthy relationship goes through various stages in life, both pleasant and unpleasant. Just because you’re going through a rough patch doesn’t mean that your partner is ignorant or distancing from you. If the negative emotions are intense and prevalent most of the times, rather than the positive and happy emotions, then these are signs of a one sided relationship.
You’re always the one apologizing.
Conflicts are part of every relationship, if you are the one always apologizing or try to fix the problem, then that is definitely not a good sign of a healthy relationship.
Either your partner could be a narcissist or they might be trying to increase the distance between the both of you. It is important to take responsibility for your actions and apologize to make amends.
You feel like you’re tiptoeing around them.
Communication is the key to every relationship. The poor consequences and unending fights can make the both of you feel unpleasant. If you are unable to communicate or express your emotions effortlessly, then it is a sign of a poor relationship.
Living in a bubble and hoping that everything will fall in to place living the good times with your partner is only a deception. If you cannot reveal your true emotions and understand each other, then moving separate ways is a logical option.
You’re never certain about how they are feeling.
If communication isn’t transparent or unambiguous, understanding what your partner is feeling becomes difficult and frustrating. To sustain a relationship, sharing similar life goals and relationship goal is necessary.
Uncertainty in a relationship can make you unaware of your future as a couple, also leave you speculating about your partner. You need a mutual understanding about each other’s boundaries and ambitions.
You’re the only one bringing up issues with the relationship.
It will keep getting piled up to an extent you start feeling emotionally abandoned and mentally exhausted. The key to a balanced relationship is being able to speak your mind to your partner.
Fights are not always bad. Unspoken words for a prolonged time is a sign of a poor relationship. If you are the only one taking the initiative to bring up what’s bothering, or attempts to resolve the unspoken issues in your relationship. Then it seems like one-sided expectations.
If you’re talking to your friends and families about your feelings more than your partner, then this is a red flag that you must take notice of.
They freak out if you set boundaries.
Boundaries are important to build and establish trust and mutual respect. It is one of the most fundamental to live together harmoniously with your significant other. Boundaries can be physical, emotional, sexual, and financial. It will help you reduce conflicts and misunderstandings.
Boundaries can be anything from wanting to sleep early, avoiding a night out, or even unpleasant emotions with regard to intimacy. If your partner gets furious and irritable about your limitations, it is highly unlikely they will respect your any other decisions.
You’re not on the same page about the important things.
Our life goals and objectives may change with time, and there is nothing wrong with this. But when you’re in a relationship, it is necessary to check if your ambitions or goals coincide with each other’s. If your destinations or priorities lead you to two opposite directions, then it isn’t worth holding on to.
Hence, it is crucial you are on the same page about the important things in your relationship and your priorities match. If both of you are on your own, have never discussed your ambitions as a team, or have conflicting expectations.
Your partner’s calendar takes priority.
Making compromises in a relationship is a good sign if both partners are equally making this contribution. If you keep adjusting your schedules to spend some quality time with your partner, then there is something wrong.
If your partner does not make time from their busy schedules and expects you to change your priorities each time, it is very disrespectful and inconsiderate.
Ignoring the red flags in a relationship on the pretext of love and adjustments will not be healthy in the long run. The only logical way two romantic partners can continue their relationship in the long run is by mutual feelings towards each other. One sided expectations and compromises will only lead to suffocation and emotional exhaustion.
If you are someone who has started to feel distanced from your partner, then talk and communicate the way you are feeling.
What causes one-sided relationships?
As a couple, your life goals and emotions don’t meet the way they used to due to your changes in personality and life goals can cause you to drift apart.
Why do people stay in one-sided relationships?
Letting go of a person you love is difficult. Hence, people hold on to a relationship expecting the other person to change or improve.
Can you change a one-sided relationship?
No, because you cannot change the way a person feels. Your partner will have to participate in improving the unbalanced relationship.